Morality and property rights

Let me first lay down the disclaimer before you read this post. If you don't like prostitution and can't handle me discussing it (not that I condone prostitution, but it sure is fun to joke about), then come back tomorrow because this may offend your precious religious/moral beliefs. Ok then, for the rest of you...sounds like you may have spent a little (maybe not enough) time north of Vegas.

A discussion was sparked in class today over property rights in cord blood, a fetus, your kidney, your arm, your leg, your third leg, you name it. Are these things property? Can they be sold? I haven't checked E-bay, but I'm sure it's out there. Then another student in class said, "You should be able to do what you want with your body parts. They're your property." Then the professor took the topic into prostitution and discussed the property aspect of prostitution related acts. Is your body property? Can you sell it?

The reason why I bring all of this up is because I view things from a totally different perspective. Who gives a damn about property rights with regard to selling your body? I think its blown (yeah funny word when discussing prostitution, eh?) out of proportion by discussing the property rights. Prostitution is not about selling your body contrary to what most dimwits think. My view is that it's selling your services. It's no different than flipping burgers at McDonald's. Think about it. A prostitute provides pleasure to those that seek out the services. In return for the service, one fronts the money. When the service is rendered, the transaction is completed. How is that any different than a barber or chiropractor? Are barbers selling their bodies when cutting your hair? The hands become occupied and can do nothing else. So tell me how it's different. Is it because it requires no education to spread the legs? I think not. Is it because it's immoral? That's ridiculous. Don't let morals get in the way. Those are over rated. Get out there and make some money. If prostitution is your cup of tea, have at it.

Tickling your fancy

For those that know me, you're aware of my political aspirations. Yes, one day that White House will be mine. And yes, yes, we'll have keg parties with couch burning on the front lawn...don't worry, I don't forget where I come from. Some people have wild fantasies. Whether you enjoy frog gigging, poker, molesting sheep...it doesn't matter as long as it tickles your fancy. What tickles my fancy is power and fame. I was hoping to move into 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue this winter, but it looks like Obama beat me to it. I guess I'll just have to work my way up chain. I was in search of a short cut, but it doesn't look like that will play out in my favor. I'm not sure what states had hanging chad issues this year, but it's definitely apparent since I didn't receive the majority vote.

Hypo time

I've been slacking a bit on the blog lately, so I figured I'd sit my happy ass down and write one for a change. That way I won't lose my handful of loyal readers. Well, this is the last week of classes, minus a couple of review courses next Monday. Then it's time for Finals. Or as I call it, my premature visit with Hell. This was a much different type of semester than were the first three. This semester was by far the busiest of them all. With that being said, it sure did fly by. Of course, the Hurricane Gustav hiccup gave me a tad bit of a vacation in the beginning of the semester. You ask, what time is it? It's my hypo time. My favorite time of year in the blogosphere. For those of you regulars, you know I have a little fun with what I've learned in classes by coming up with my own little hypos. Hypo 1:

George Gonja was a mentally retarded individual who decided to purchase a condo in one of New York's most distinguished facilities in Manhattan. Of course you may ask where the hell George got the money to do so, since he blows his wad on cocaine and booze and has never held a job. Let's just say, he is a lucky beneficiary of Obama's new tax plan to help out the hippies lacking a respectable IQ. Under the condo association guidelines, it states in part, "No medical marijuana growing shall be permitted in any residence. If you want to chief doobies, please move back to California." In all his wisdom, George decides not only to grow the plants on the premises, but also to hang them in the community hallway to add a little life and decoration to the boring two-tone paint scheme. Although George is not that brilliant, he is a master at growing the world's finest green leaves. He patented his invention with the USPTO by tricking them into believing that this was a biotech invention for practical medicinal applications. Several of the condo association members were outraged with George's decor and sought to enjoin him from continuing to grow plants at his leisure on the premises. The condo association argues that he is in violation of the association guidelines. George brings a counter-claim alleging that the condo association guidelines violate his Constitutional rights and are a blatant showing of discrimination against pot heads. Please discuss all causes of action for both parties and who will prevail on said causes of action.

Shut-eye

My eye lids are getting heavy from all this reading. I've read well over 1000 pages of case law this past week trying to prepare for finals. The case book authors tend to find the most interesting cases available to spark interest in particular subjects. So it's not nearly as painful as it sounds. Topics range from legalized usage of marijuana, to gun toting rednecks, to trademarks for condoms, to trademark infringement in the porn industry, to spreading of venereal diseases, to landlords and tenants kicking each other's ass, to incestual relationships, to bastard children, to trafficking cocaine, to lavish parties, and to many other random topics. That's why law school is so much better than engineering. Assaults and batteries just don't occur that often in the derivation of mathematical equations.

As one attorney stated to me, it's not that often that you can write a paper about a man shaking his penis at a prison guard and be expected to provide the details.

Random thoughts, nothing better to write about

The question posed is always, why leave a profession to go back to school. Someone asked me the other day if I enjoyed law school and whether I would do it again if faced with the decision. I love it. Hands down the answer is yes I'd do it again. My social life has taken a blow, but three years of hell is better than a lifetime at trying to make ends meet. I realize that not all attorneys become wealthy, but this one will. I don't look up to heroes. Heroes are for followers. That's not to say that there is anything wrong with a follower. For every leader, there are those that follow. It's just not my cup of tea. I chase dreams and aspirations. Law school just happens to be the one avenue that must be taken to catch a few of those dreams.

People bitch about attorneys making lots of money off of other peoples' problems and being scum bags. My response is "Get over it." Sure the profession has potential to make you rich. Scum bags though? Depends on how you view it. I see it as solving problems for people that could not otherwise do for themselves. People say, "I can represent myself better than any attorney." You really think so, eh? Well, good luck. Let me know how that turns out.

Here's my justification. Law school is one of the most grueling experiences that one could possibly be subjected to mentally. In addition, my tuition is $35,000 a year. That doesn't include books and all the other expenses. I'll have a 150K mortgage when I graduate law school with only a piece of framed cotton paper to show for it. For those that succeed, they are rewarded. That's why I don't believe in spreading the wealth. I busted my ass to get where I am. I took the risk by the willingness to endure such debt to reap the benefits later. I can't file bankruptcy to avoid paying student loans. I'm stuck. Here's a shovel. Start digging your way out. And when I do, I shall enjoy my riches with no strings attached.

Another shot of pain, please

With finals coming close, the stress in the air is becoming more noticeable than the New Orleans stench. 1L's are running around the campus bitching about finals and how the stress is so painful, 2L's are whining about the load and having another year to go, and 3L's are just drinking more beer awaiting graduation. They always say, "The first year they scare you to death, the second year they work you to death, and the third year they bore you to death." I don't know about the third year, but the first two conjunctive elements of that statement are dead on. Law school is a different animal. I've said it before and I'll say it again, it changes you as a person. For better or for worse, I don't know. But at least I feel smarter. More cynical too. It's amazing how many stress-relief seminars that the school has in place to keep you from going insane. I have to say the most effective of the seminars are the ones that provide beer. Who in the hell promotes beer drinking as stress relief? Leave it to those damn attorneys. You're taught your whole life that consuming alcohol as a stress relief mechanism means that you're an alkie. Not according to this profession. Here it's a character building exercise. Drink the pain away and go on to the next case. Lawyers are better than anyone when it comes to separating feelings from logic. If you want logic, seek an attorney. If you want feelings, go join an activist group. Most people say, "Wow that's immoral!" Who cares, it's logical and that's all that matters.

Interior decoration

We got off on a tangent for a little discussing politics, cheap beer, and other nonsense. So let me push this blog back in the direction of law school.

MySpace seems to be at it again. They keep ripping applications and features off Facebook and disguising them as their own. Now they've seemed to rip off the "People you may know" tool. Maybe I should send my resume to Facebook to see if they would like to hire me as in-house counsel. I think they should sue the piss out of MySpace for copyright infringement. Of course, that assumes that they were bright enough to copyright their website material. I'm sure MySpace could turn around and sue Facebook for some of the same crap. Maybe I should send my resume to MySpace too.

My weekend in TN was fun. Now it's back to reality though. 3 more weeks until finals. Time is slipping away. I need to go bury my head in the stacks and take a few power naps in the library carrels. Jack myself up on caffeine and enter into study mode. Oh the joys of law school.

If anyone cares, my interview last week went well, but it's not usually a good sign when one of the shareholders from the firm starts the interview out with, "You do know the economy is down at the moment? We don't know if we have the resources to extend any offers. With that being said, you were selected for an interview because we're interested in your credentials." I'll send off my Thank-you letters and wait on another one of those 100% cotton rejection letters. I think I have enough to start a collage. My place needs decorating so maybe I'll go purchase some frames and hang them next to my Engineering diplomas. It can serve as a constant reminder to let me know that I once had a real job. Then again...if I stay jobless, I can benefit from Obama's new tax plans.

Who turned on the air conditioner?

I arrived in Nashville this morning without incident. Not that I expected anything whack to happen, but we've all seen those Southwest Airlines shows on tv. I noticed something today after getting here. Usually I drive up from N.O. The long drive tends to blur the differences between there and here. Today I flew in. I left a city where people pack concealed heat to cap others just for the hell of it. I arrived in a place where people carry guns in case they stroll across the golden opportunity to bring home a new wall decoration. There is a big difference between Thuggish-Ruggish neighborhoods to Hillbilly Hollow. The difference is not a decrease (or increase) of quality of people in the two very different places, it's just a mere change of ethnicity. Same people, different makeup.

I attempted to study on the plane, but it's such a short flight that the plane never levels out. Therefore, my ears kept popping due to the rapid changes in altitude. Screw the studying...Jack & Coke please. As I got off the plane, two Cajun rednecks (on their way to Vegas) said, "Let's go grab a beer." Of course, it was barely 8 in the morning at that time. But when you come from a place where no bars hold, it's a shock to find out that drinking establishments actually close up for the evenings. It seems so sacriligious. Anyway, study today, interview tomorrow, and then we'll see what else pops up.

Check in time

My Constitutional Law class this morning was a joy...take notice of the sarcasm. Upon entering the classroom, the professor stated, "This is a wonderful period in American history." The thoughts rumbling in my head were, "Not everyone is so enthusiastic about communism, but whatever floats your boat." I won't be as hard on Obama as the liberal sissies were on bashing Bush for the last 8 years. Obama will fail to win me over like he seems to think he can do. He's the next President, so I'll support him. But that doesn't mean that I'll be brain-washed into believing his socialist policies. I don't believe in redistributing the wealth. If I become filthy rich, then the money is mine and not for the taking of others. If I want to share my wealth, then I'll do so as I see fit. If I am filthy rich, it is likely due to the wise decisions I have made along the way. I'm not against the poor folks, but most of the time people are poor due to laziness and the unwillingness to make an honest living. Please give me a legitimate reason why I should help "level the playing field." Like the famous quote goes, "If you're looking for 'sympathy', you can find it in the dictionary between 'shit' and 'syphilis' because you're not getting any from me."

With that being said, he is our next President. Stand behind him while he is in office and hopefully he'll do a good job. It's nonsense to say that you're going to move out of the country just because someone takes office that you don't agree with. We're still the best nation in the world and that won't change because of one particular individual. If he doesn't do a good job, then we'll just vote his ass out of office in 4 years. That's the power of a democracy.

On a more uplifting note, I'll be flying into Nashville tomorrow for another interview with one of those "elite" firms. Hopefully, I'll land the job, but we'll see how it goes.

Unqualified voters and target practice

Since when did schools start letting kids out of school on Election day? I know I was never that lucky back then and I'm sure as hell not that lucky now. Instead of letting kids out of school for the day, they should be on lockdown within the confines of school property throughout the day while the polls are open. Feed 'em cheese & crackers, whiskey & beer, whatever the hell you want, but just make them go to school. No wonder why kids today have the brains of my left nut. They get out of school for every reason known to man. If nothing else, educate them so that they can make wise decisions when they do get old enough to vote on election day. Speaking of kids voting...

The voting age should be raised to 25. Very few people under the age of 25 have the capability to form their own opinion based on the actual political issues that we face. Sorry kids, but getting your political education from Carson Daly, MTV, the Dixie Chicks, lame activist groups, MySpace, and Hollywood doesn't make you qualified to vote. It makes you more of an idiot than you already may have been. Don't raise the whole, "If I can go register for the Army and fight for my country, then I should be able to vote, drink, etc." That's nonsense. We recruit you for the Army simply because you have not the brains to do anything else in society at that age. That's why you have the choice: College, Army, or McDonald's.

In addition to raising the voting age, we should lower the drinking age and raise the age at which a kid can get a driver's license. Let 'em start drinking at twelve. They need to experience enough adversity in order to figure out that they should do something more than just being drunk and stupid their entire life. Get it out of the way early that way they will have sobered up by the time we allow them to go to the polls. Raise the driver's license age so that these young punks can get the drinking out of their system before they get the fancy idea of throwing beer bottles at road signs and other nonsense that I was 100% guilty of during my youth.

And you thought I was just going to rant and rave about kids, eh? People who do not have jobs and have never held jobs and do not contribute to society should not be able to vote. Lazy people, bums, the poor crack heads that bitch and moan about how we should spread the wealth...these people should not be able to vote.

And the winner of the election is...

Hopefully I'll post something tomorrow morning that I was hoping to post this evening. I already composed the post, however, it is on my other computer and I don't feel like powering it up at the moment. In the meantime, I would like to remind everyone to go vote tomorrow. It's important that people get out and pencil my name in on the ballot. Without your help, I won't be able to overcome the pollsters predictions of either Obama or McCain winning this election.

Unfortunately, I'm too young to become president at this point in time. So I encourage everyone to petition your representatives to propose amending the Constitution to allow a specific age exception for me. As your president, I will make beer tax-free, I will fight to get you one free ticket for you to shoot your enemy in the foot, and I will veto all bills that cross my desk that I don't understand. Oh, and I promise that everyone will receive free night vision goggles and one free RPG per household, just for the sake of having some fun during the 4th of July.

Halloween Costumes

This city, of course, is probably one of the greatest cities to celebrate Halloween. You got the Voodoo scene, the ghost crap, the witch-craft, those wannabe psychic tarot card readers, beer, candy, parades...the list goes on and on. Sounds sort of like Halloween, eh? That's just a taste of normal life here. Those are all great reasons why this place is the perfect setting for Halloween. But what about the number 1 reason why this place is great for Halloween...

As I'm driving home just after dark, trick-or-treaters were out in full force. Glancing over at the sidewalk I notice a family walking down the sidewalk. The kids are dressed up carrying their buckets. Trailing behind the kids are the parents pulling a radio-flyer, which I assume is to carry the load of candy. But wait, the parents are also pulling an ice chest (presumably full of beer). But wait, each adult has a beer in hand. Classic! In any other city, the parents would be fined for public intoxication and would probably go to jail for child neglect. Here, it's a part of life.

And those weren't the only parents toting coolers on Halloween night.